Category: For A Laugh

humorous stories

On Writing

by Lucy M. Young

Whenever I see a blank white pad of paper
I get an overwhelming urge to write,
So I sharpen my pencils, make a clear space on the table,
And sit while all coherent thought takes flight.

With ready pencil poised I sit, my mind a total blank -
Where are those lofty noble thoughts divine
That filled my mind this morning while I was in the shower
And couldn't write a single blessed line?

Tonight while I am sleeping all those thoughts will come together,
And I'll write a masterpiece the world will prize;
A manuscript of high scholastic talent will be born
To be lost forever when I wake at sunrise.

A Gardener’s Nightmare

by Lucy M. Young

photo by Renatto Mora
I wonder what the good Lord had in mind
When He created green tomato horn worms.
Did He think them beautiful?
They are a truly lovely color
And all creatures great and small are beautiful to Him.
Or was it their tenacity and strength that He admired?
Their imposing size intimidates the birds
And their prodigious appetites are something to behold.

They are a gardener's nightmare.
I'm sure there must have been a twinkle in His eye
When He envisioned our reaction to them.
I know He had good reasons for putting them in my tomato patch
But I do wonder what He really had in mind
When He created them.

Only the Good Die Young

Lucy M. Young






photo by Joel Valve on Unsplash





I smile at the sky when I wake in the morn
Dark clouds, wind and rain I cheerfully scorn;
By worry and fear I will not be torn -
Only the good die young.

I might be hit by a sudden fierce storm,
Or danger in any shape or form.
Why should I fret? I am safe from all harm -
Only the good die young.

I've nothing to fear as I go through each day
Safe from pitfalls along the way;
Fearless in the spite of not knowing my way -
Only the good die young.

So I'll ramble along on my journey through life,
Safe and secure through the storm and the strife;
Ignoring the perils which threaten my life -
For only the good die young.

	


	
	






	
	

		
	

		
Be the Good Lord Willin’…
	


	

		

by Lucy M. Young





When I reluctantly awake
  And glaring sunlight blinds my eyes,
I know I'll somehow meet the day -
  Be the good Lord willin' and the crick don't rise.

There is so much I need to do;
  I'd like to cleverly devise
A neat way out, but I'll do my best -
  Be the good Lord willin' and the crick don't rise.

The laundry waits, the dishes too,
  And dinner I must improvise;
It seems too much but I'll work things out -
  Be the good Lord willin' and the crick don't rise.

When Gabriel blows that golden horn
  And we must break our earthly ties,
I'll be there with my load of sin -
  Be the good Lord willin' and the crick don't rise.



photo by Jeffrey Hamilton on Unsplash

	


	
	






	
	

		
	

		
On Dieting
	


	

		

by Lucy M. Young





Dieting is a piece of cake
And how I wish I had one;
Faithfully I eat "good" things,
But how I crave the "bad" ones.

Omitting sugar, starch and fat -
Following a plan;
Counting calories, weighing food,
Don't forget the bran.

Struggling from morn to night
With "goodies" all around,
Standing on the scales at last
To find I've gained a pound.

photo by I Yunmai on Unsplash